Every heartache I have experienced was painful in some degree. Whether it was from a relationship or friendship, I still felt something when they ended. Meeting someone new whom I truly care for makes all the heartache in the past so worth it. I know it does sound dark and twisted when put into words, but every heartache seems to lead up to the one person who won’t cause you pain and stress. Everything that has been carried behind you back and pulling you down for years feels well worth when you meet the right person.
I should not enjoy talking to you this much. This wasn’t supposed to happen…
I’m finally 20. Should I feel super different because I’m in my 20s now? I honestly still feel 19 LOL. Anyways, I spent it with my true friends as half of them didn’t really bother to show up or answer my invitation for that matter. I was kind of hurt because I showed up to all of their birthdays regardless of my schedule. Anyways, I went clubbing the night of and it was pretty fun. Other than the fact that a few assholes showed up and kind of tried to ruin my mood, I didn’t let that get to me. I had my true friends with me and I was happy. Fuck yo…I’m 20…that doesn’t even sound right.
Friends: Dude, don’t go for him. He’s bad news
Me: Yeah, I can see that. You guys are totally right
-a week later-
Me: So we’re seeing each other now
Friends: Don’t fall too hard, I don’t trust him
-another week later-
Me: Guys, I fell too hard and my heart is totally broken
Seriously, I have this bad curse that makes gets me attracted to fuckboys. It’s not like I intentionally search for them. In fact, I never search for anyone ever…things just happen to me. Since the beginning I’ve always been into sweet guys with a bit of an edge. Guys who tease me and can bicker with me but are genuinely caring and sweet. For some reason that falls under the fuckboy category. Literally someone just told me ” wait, you’re talking to him? dude, don’t. He’s gonna play you.” ARE YOU SERIOUS? AGAIN??? Why does my life have to be like this.
Not like I ever had one, but I’ve been writing so many papers that my ass has magically disappeared. I think I’ve been using my ass more than my brain to write these papers to be quite honest. Literally though…I have been sitting so much that both my ass cheeks hurt. I’m so tired of this. Concave ass is now a thing. I made it a thing.
A little off track from my previous blog posts, but funny story today. I have to get research participation credits for my psychology major, so I decided to register for one. I was wondering why this experiment used up a full 1.5hours, much longer than most. I fucking had a swimming cap looking thing with holes in them on my head. On top of that, the holes were attached to electrode wires…think the whole equipment is called EED or something. I looked like a fucking outer-space synchronized swimmer. That’s not even the worst part. The researcher squirted out blue gel through each hole of the cap, so I had like gel all over my scalp. Thank god I was allowed to wash my hair cuz fuck…it looked nasty. Washing my hair over the sink was such a struggle though. Next time, I’m just going to stick to 0.5 hour experiments. Seriously wish I had a picture saved on my phone.